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Deep Dive: How to Get the MOST from Your Psychic/Mediumship Reading

Feb 27, 2023

 Have you ever wondered... What's the difference between psychic and mediumship (or which one is better)? How about what NOT to do before your reading session? Can your loved one still communicate if they are responsible for their own passing? In this solo episode get a better understanding of everything from preparing for your reading, do's and don't, tips for skeptics, and I'll explain why the spirit world knows you'll be there even before I do! PLUS I go into details about some of the most commonly asked (and most misunderstood) parts of psychic and mediumship communications.

Whether you are someone who has never had a reading before or you are a psychic medium yourself, there's something in this conversation for you!

Show notes:

Spring Forward with Spirit demonstration of mediumship link:
March 19, 2023 at 12p PT/3p ET/8p UK Live on Zoom!

Have you ever attended a Demonstration of Mediumship? 
Do you know that your crossed over loved ones are not in some far off place but that they are still with you, just in a different way?

Whether this is your 1st time or your 100th time at a demonstration, witnessing the Love of the Spirit World is always a special experience.

Join Psychic Mediums Carolyn Wilkins and Joy Giovanni as they deliver evidence and heart warming messages from loved ones in the Spirit world! 

What is special about this event:

  • -Join from the comfort of your own home  
  • -Several attendees will receive personal messages from loved ones in Spirit
  • -Witness detailed evidence that the soul continues on and that our loved ones are still with us, just in a different way. 
  • -Special timing in honor of the Spring Equinox


Full Transcript:

Hey, beautiful soul. And welcome back to another episode of spirit speakeasy. If you are a new visitor, I'm so happy to have you with us today. If you are a returning visitor, you know, I love you. And thanks for being here. Today, I really want to talk about how to get the most from a psychic or mediumship reading. I'm going to talk a little bit about the difference between those two, what is psychic, what is mediumship, I'm going to talk about common mistakes that I see when people are preparing to have a reading. And I just want to set up some of your expectations so that if you at some point, decide that you're ready for your own reading, whether it's with me or any other psychic or medium, you can just have some of these not so secret techniques to prepare yourself. I don't think they're secret, but I guess a lot of people don't know them. It's a lot of things I didn't know when I was new to all of this and couldn't really find the information anywhere. So as you guys know, that's one of the things that I want to do with our time together is dive into some of these topics that there is not a lot of information about anywhere else. I do want to throw out a little bit of a trigger warning there are potentials here that we might be talking about people who have passed as a result of completion of suicide or overdose, or other difficult and tragic passings. I might be giving some examples in this podcast episode. So I'm hoping and my intention is always to give this information in an uplifting and positive way and to help us understand it always with, you know, a positive perspective. But I just want to give you a little bit of warning in case any of those things, or topics or triggers for you, you can join me on the next episode and maybe skip this one. But if you feel like you want to understand more about what happens to people who do crossover, or do pass away due to overdose, completion of suicide, those kind of a thing, then stick around, because we're going to touch into that as well. Without further ado, let's get into it. So let me just tell you the difference between psychic and medium ship in a reading and I do want to let you know that I'm speaking for myself, the truth is all readers all mediums, psychics, etc, we don't all work exactly the same, we work a little bit differently. And even our gifts, the way we understand information, receive information. You know, it's it's a little bit different for each of us. Now, when we are doing a reading, when I'm giving a reading for someone, what's happening is what we call a mystical experience, meaning it's not something that we can recreate. It's something in the moment, it's something that's happening with a combination of the energies of you know, the person that I'm reading for my sitter is often what they're called, are the recipient, my own energy and then the energy from the other side. And even if the reading is not a mediumship reading, meaning not communicating with someone's crossed over loved ones, we still all have guides, supporters, positive energy, a spirit team, angels, you know, various positive support beings, if you will, for lack of a better word on the other side. So there's lots of energy happening in any session. The other thing that I just want to touch on before I give you the difference between psychic and mediumship is some of this could be considered a little bit of semantics as we go. And you'll see, one of the tough things is there's not a standardized language around psychic work, mediumship energy work all of these mystical experiences. So sometimes there can be two different mediums using two different explanations of the same thing and they might seem like they're contradicting, but that's not necessarily the case, we really are still working out, you know, languaging, around all of these mystical experiences, because we're trying to put into language, something that is otherworldly, something that is mystical, something that is energetic, it's not quite the same, but it's almost like trying to help someone feel what happens in your dream, you might be able to give a bit of an explanation or a recounting of what happened, but to have someone totally understand the energy the way you felt all of that, they're not going to be able to walk in the shoes of that dream that you had because it was it was an individual once in a lifetime one of a kind experience and even when we have the same dream or similar dream more than once, it's never exactly the same, right? So just keep that in the in the back of your mind. Because I do know that you know some of these terms can be a little confusing, I'll try to explain as much as I can. But remember, it's from my perspective and my training and what I know right now. And the truth is, all of us, you know, mediums included, psychics included, we're always growing and evolving. I'm constantly in mentorship with mentor mentors here, meaning like in the physical world, and I have a spirit team and guides that mentor me and teach me as well. And I learned from every session that I do, so I'm always evolving. So right now today, as I'm recording this, in 2023, the things I'm saying 10 years from now, I might understand things differently, and I might have a different way of phrasing it. So we're ever evolving, I think that's really important to remember, as well. And even you. So if you go in for a session, for example, tomorrow, the person that you are, that day, if you were to come back a year later and go in for a session, you're a different version of yourself, you're constantly evolving, changing, growing, learning, understanding, right, just based on our day to day experiences, our life experiences, and so many more elements. So it's just important to keep that in mind that we're always growing and changing, whether you are on which side of the line you're on if you're the medium, or if you are the recipient. And actually, I know that many of you who listen, are gifted spiritually as well. So let's talk about the difference between psychic and mediumship. Now, what these two things have in common is that they are a soul to soul communication. Either way, so what I mean by that is, if I'm working psychically, that means I'm connecting my soul is connecting with the soul of the person who is my client, my sitter, my recipient, I'm connecting with your soul understanding things like choices, you're making things going on in your life challenges, you're facing emotions, you're having anything in that realm, and more. Now, mediumship is a soul to soul communication, but it is my soul blending with the soul of someone who's already crossed over to the other side, a person who is no longer in a physical body. Because the truth is, we are all souls, all individual souls having a human experience, meaning we continue on after we crossover, as we know from physics, quantum physics, energy is neither created nor destroyed, it just changes form. So when our physical body is not sustained any longer, our soul continues on and so mediumship evidential mediumship in the way that I practice in readings, and many of us do, is a communication between my soul and the soul of someone on the other side. Now, where this becomes interesting, I mean, the whole thing is interesting, as far as I'm concerned, but something to know is that the type of mediumship I practice is, in a technical way. It's called evidential mediumship. Now there are lots of kinds of mediumship. And if you want to hear about several of the different kinds and meet a deep dive into what they mean, and what the differences are, let me know and we'll do that in a in another podcast. But I want to tell you a little bit about what evidential mediumship means just because it's going to lead me into this next part. So really all it means evidential. Mediumship is that when loved ones from the spirit world communicate, when my soul is communicating with their soul. I like them to share some specific details about who they were here in the physical world, so that you, my sitter, my recipient, can recognize them. Now, the types of details that they'll bring forward really depend on them. So some spirit communicators, some loved ones, some people on the other side, will make their personalities really clear. Some will share details about their life, you know, their life experience or stories of their life, if you will, some will share memories that my recipient or the family shares with them, you know, that vacation that we took, or that holiday that we celebrate, and some of the details about that.
For example, some will share details about their passing and some won't. And really, they're still a person on the other side. So just like a communication with any other person, I respect them and honor where they want to take the conversation. Now, if you think about loved ones that you have, whether they're on this side or the other side, as you know, when you have a conversation with them, you can't necessarily dictate what details they want to share it what they don't, it's very similar. I don't make demands of them in that way. It's just not how the communication works. So with the psychic work for me III, I try to be really clear and let my clients know, okay, I'm psychically in your space understanding this about your work your relationship, et cetera, versus, you know, sometimes a loved one say, you know, perhaps it's your mom or dad or brother or sister, perhaps they have some comments about your work or your relationship, I try to let my clients know, okay, this is coming from who dad mom. But usually, that's after they've already established and given some details about who they are now, from the side of the sitter, and if you're a medium, feel free to chime in, in the comments, and let me know, you know how this works for you. For me, some of the tips that I like to share with people is, you know, just go into a session with an open heart and mind.
This is a tough one. And here's why. A lot of times, if someone is going for a session, you know, ideally, it's because they feel a pull on their heart or a call on their soul, or, you know, perhaps it's something that they just been thinking about, and really longing for or wanting for, there's usually a specific need, maybe there's something going on in their life, and they really need some insight and guidance about maybe they've lost someone that they're really needing to hear from to validate, prove, quote, unquote, if you will, that that soul that loved one continues on just in a different way. And it is one of my favorite things about evidential mediumship is that, that evidence, those details, prove, validate that your loved one knows who they are, they know who you are, they still retain their memories. And every session is unique. So perhaps in some cases, they're they're coming forward talking about a challenging situation that you may have had and wanting to. Maybe they're giving apologies, maybe they're giving details that let you know that they understand things a little differently now from their perspective. But not all sessions are heavy, some times and a lot of the time, depending on their personality, again, some spirit people is what I usually call them, some loved ones on the other side, come through with humor and with anecdotes and with, you know, fond memories, or funny memories or quirky bits about their personality or very small memories that you and they share that perhaps we hadn't even ever discussed with anyone else. So really, when you're preparing to go in for a session, I usually encourage people to just like I said, have an open heart and mind. And what I mean by that is beyond wanting to hear from your loved ones are wanting to hear about, you know that issue in your life, that challenge in your life that you're needing guidance on, trying not to have too much of an agenda. So for me, I like to encourage people to just let the session be what it's going to be. But it's good to know that I wouldn't expect every question you've ever had every loved one that's crossed over to come through in one session. Really what I am doing in a session is trying to address the greatest need, perhaps it's the greatest need on your heart. Perhaps it's the greatest need of your loved ones in the spirit world, because truly, they're my boss, I work for spirit, I'm responsible to them. So I'm addressing the greatest need. And sometimes what we want, and what we need is not the same thing. Sometimes it is, but sometimes it's not. You know, perhaps you might be desperately needing to hear from that partner that crossed over that you're needing to know, I need to know that they're safe, I need to know that they're still with me. But beyond that, I wouldn't sit there and try to make a laundry list of okay, well, they need to say this. And I need them to talk about this. And I need them to use this catchphrase so that I am convinced that it's them. It doesn't work that way. As much as it pains me to say it because I know that's often what people want. It really doesn't work that way. And sometimes, you know, me just giving a name, for example, in saying, Oh, I have this gentleman and his name is Mike. For me, I'll tell you, that's a lot less evidential than, Oh, I have your brother here. And he wants to talk about how you guys used to take a trip to the lake every summer, and that you would both go fishing and you always caught things and he never did. And it was a big joke between the two of you. That proves that Mike is here so much more than just saying his name. So I really encourage you, you know, especially if it's a mediumship reading or mediumship is a part of the session for me. I don't box those out and say either you're getting a mediumship session or you're getting a psychic session again, I just am open to address the greatest need at that moment. it, and my soul and spirit helps me understand what that is during the session. So for me, it's so much more proof for validation or evidence of this gentleman, Mike for him to tell about his memories. And in that he's also showing his personality, he's showing his sense of humor, he's, he's highlighting the relationship between the two of you, whereas just a name drop. I mean, that could be a lot of different people. And the other thing to know with that is that I think a lot of people do know this at that point, but at this point, but maybe not, it's not like your loved one just comes next to the medium, and talks in their ear, like they're on a telephone, it doesn't work that way, I'm going to get a little bit into in just a minute, a little bit of how it works, just so you can have a bit of a bit of an understanding that remember mystical experience, it's not necessarily working the same way every time for the medium, even. That's why training is so important. Because even though these gifts are natural, they're a part of who we are, they're a part of our souls expression, they're a part of our gifts in this lifetime, we still do need training to understand how to use them, how to understand the information, how to work with the information, how to give the information, deliver it right, say it out loud to the sitter, and how to make sense of it all. It's not, like I said, it's not just someone standing next to me, and talking to my ear and telling me what to say. Or they can say, you know, my name is Mike, it doesn't work like that, perhaps I can receive the name, but it's not in the way of them standing next to me like a person in a body talking out of a voice box with a mouth. Because remember, they don't have a physical body. So the communication, it makes sense that if you think about it, that the communication would work differently. Now, as a part of this tip, about not having an agenda, that also includes, please do not sit in your car or your house or wherever before your session and say, Okay, I just really need you to talk about this specific thing, or I really need you to say this keyword or I really, you know, it's demanding of them. I would much rather all of my clients, and it is a much more successful communication, if they don't try to demand specific information of their loved ones. Now, sometimes it works. And sometimes I could receive the information to talk about that specific topic, but not always. Sometimes it doesn't work that way. Because remember, they've got to communicate it to me in a way that I can understand that makes sense that I can then deliver and make sense of it. Do you know what I mean? Like, I'm probably not in the middle of a session, when we're talking about, you know, in that example, of your brother Mike, I'm probably not while we're talking about the lake and these trips that we would take and our summer vacations growing up and all of that, I'm probably not going to suddenly say, oh, Triscuits Oh, saltine crackers, like, it just makes no sense. It's just not the way it works. So I just invite you not to do that. And let your loved ones come through or communicate what they want to communicate what they want to share, to touch your heart. Because the other beautiful part of this is that they do still spend time with you in your day to day life, they do still understand what's going on with huge changes in your life challenges in your life. I'll give you some little example, sometimes, you know, I had a session last week. And it was a boy that had passed away. You know, it's been some time but he was a boy when he passed away. And he was articulating and explaining to me sharing with me communicating with me that the house that he lived in when he was here in the physical world that his family had moved to a different house now. So that was one of the ways that he was wanting to validate, hey, I know my family lived in this house. And I know they let go of that house. And I know they moved to this other house. And here's a little bit about this house. So in that example, this boy was sharing with me some details, some specific evidence, if you will, what we call it about what had changed in his family's home. And, you know, the recipient who was one of the parents was saying afterwards oh my gosh, you know, that was one of my big fears and concerns is that he wouldn't know that we moved or he wouldn't be able to find us. And so had I been just looking for some laundry list of details. I would have missed what this boy knew he knew his parent needed to hear. Hey, I know you moved I'm still with you. I love this new house. This is so fun. Here's how it's different from my old house, etc. If he knew that that would be the most important thing to share with his parent, I didn't know that I didn't know that that's what was heavy on their heart. And that's what I'm talking about is there's an intelligence with the spirit world, that goes far beyond what I could know or come up with, to say,
one of the other things that I want to tell you in preparing yourself for your session is to, you know, it's okay to make a list of questions. If you've got questions. Truthfully, it's best to go for a session when something's heavy on your heart, or when you're really hoping to hear from someone specific, it doesn't work as well, if you're just curious, that's just the truth. The energy works different if there's an actual need to fulfill rather than someone just being curious. And as a little side note, my one of my mentors who I mentioned, often Andy being the way he says it is, you know, mediumship is not a parlor trick, it's a spiritual gift. So doing it, as you know, oh, we're just curious, you know, it can sometimes work. But it's definitely not the same as when there is an actual need when there's something you're going through that you need guidance on, or when there's a loved one that you're just really wanting to hear from. Now, me personally, the way I work is, I don't like to know anything about my clients before the session. So my booking works online, people go to my website, they look at my calendar, they choose their appointment, they do everything totally outside of me. So I just see their name their appointment time. And then I you know, send them the email to remind them to come to the session, whether it's online via zoom or in person in my office here in Southern California. So I don't like any information about them, I don't need to know who they want to hear from, I don't need to know anything about them. I don't want a list of questions up front. It's just not the way I work. No shade on anyone who works differently. But that's just not the way I work. So if you are someone who is very skeptical, I just want to say, it's fair to be skeptical, right? You don't have to believe everything, everyone tells you all the time, it's good to be skeptical. It's good to be discerning. It's good to go in and let something touch your heart rather than just making it fit, right. So it's okay, if you want to book your session and not use your real name. A lot of people don't know this. So if you're someone who feels very skeptical, because the truth is, if you're in the back of your mind the whole session saying I bet you she Googled me and I bet you and I don't know I don't. She's working too hard. This doesn't sound like someone's talking in her ear, which again, is not the way it works. So if it's going to destroy your session, because you're in the back of your mind, trying to keep a tally mark of how you feel it's going, it's just going to destroy the energy of the session. So if you're someone who feels like, Oh, I'm worried this person might Google me or oh, I'm worried. They might know information about me by searching my name, for example. Sidenote, no medium has time to do that. We just don't have time. Not only are we working people, but we have other lives, too. And another thing to know about that, with me and with lots of my colleagues, the more I know about someone, the harder it is to read for them, I don't even read for my own friends and family, I refer them to other colleagues that I know and trust. Because I know what's going on in their life. So I can't be objective, and I can't use the validations in the same way I would. So I don't want to know anything about you. And, you know, that's why it helps to leave some space between readings, even if there's a medium or a psychic that you work with. You know, over time, more than one session, it's good to leave a gap. So some things that happened in your life between sessions that we don't know about. But it is okay. I haven't some times where someone will just book with a first name. And last initial, or I've had it where a client has booked with a name that is not their name, like a totally different name almost like when a celebrity checks into a hotel. I mean, I wouldn't use like a cartoon characters name because I'm gonna be like something weird. But you know, you could you could pick a different name. And what's funny is I had a client do that I've had more than one client do that. I tell people, it's totally fine. With it with any medium that you're signing up with, you know, for a session, you can use a different name, they don't know your name, pick a different name, use your middle name, whatever you like. So I had a client and that's what happened. The session went well, they received what they needed, their loved ones came through and the communication was what needed to be and at the end of the session, they said you know, I'm just going to make up names. You know, my name is not actually Julie, my name is Margaret. And I just was like, Okay, well, that's fine. I don't I don't need to know someone's name and if it's gonna, if it's going to make yourself Shouldn't better or set you at ease or let you not be stressed out, then do it. Now, I know some mediums will give tips and say, you know, make sure you have the whole day off when you're going to get a reading and in a perfect world, yeah, maybe. So that you have time to process afterwards or in case, in case emotions come up for you, you have some time and don't have to like rush right back to work or right back to your family. But in the real world, that's not always possible for everybody. So what I would suggest is, if you're going to plan your reading in the middle of a day, or you know, at the end of a busy day, just make sure you're giving yourself enough time on other either side of that reading, meaning, say you're going to do a Zoom reading with me on Thursday. And say that you know that you've got kid pick up at two. And you know, you've got dinner and lots of things, sports after that, I wouldn't make your session at one o'clock, if you know, you've got to be picking up kids at two, I would make it earlier in the day, maybe 10 or 11, when you have a good amount of time. Same goes at the end of the day, like say you're going to do a 6pm session and you know, you get off work at 545. And you're going to come into my office in Southern California and you are racing and rushing and battling traffic and stressed out and sweating when you're trying to park and you know really just coming in in a in a tornado of energy. That's not good for you either, because then it takes a little extra time for you to settle down for you to just kind of relax and be a little bit open. So in that case, I might book it a little later. So that you, you know, do have a little bit of extra time in case traffic in case parking in case, maybe he didn't go to bathroom or get a drink of water, you know what I mean? So I usually encourage people just to plan things so that they can have just a little bit of time, even if it's 20 minutes on either side, or 15 minutes on either side of the session, just so you're not stressed out. But like I said, it's it's not always possible for all of us to have the entire day off. If you can plan it on a day off. That's okay, too. But if it's not possible for you just try to leave a little extra time before and after. Now, sometimes people will ask me that, do they need to like meditate before? Do they need to? Is there anything they need to do to prepare? No, not really, the more at ease you can be like I said, it's it's best if you're not rushing around like a frantic chicken. It's best if you're not almost like demanding of your loved ones, like we were talking about with this laundry list of things to prove to you and just let them bring what they want to bring to prove to you because you know, they know about their life and your life. So just like that, just like a conversation in life, you're not dictating to Aunt Sue what she is and is not allowed to talk to you about in life, she's just gonna say what she wants to say. And sometimes that's part of their personality, too, right? So, you know, besides those couple things, there's really not a ton you need to do to prepare yourself. Now another tip that I suggest for people is if the medium you're working with offers an option for a recording of the session, I would say always do it. Here's why. A few reasons. I'm sure there's more reasons that I'm going to give you. But here's a few. One, you're in a mystical experience, too. So lots is happening at one time, you're trying to remember details that the medium is giving you you're trying to, you know, have this experience and let it touch your emotions with your loved ones. Often they'll bring details that are things that we've forgotten about or emotions, you know, that maybe we weren't expecting in the way that they come. So having the recording for afterwards is great, because it's so easy to forget all of the details that happen in a session. Even me if I get a reading from someone, I always want a recording. If it's not something they offer, for example, like they you can't buy a recording of your session. Perhaps you can also ask them if you can record it. So I have that sometimes when clients come in person, for example, they might also record on their phone. And I allow it just because like I said, I think the recordings are really important. I prefer recordings over taking notes. And here's why. When you're taking notes and writing down for that split second that you're writing your task switching, right so you're not listening to me you're not paying attention to what's happening. You're not
having an open mind so that you know when someone tells you something and you're like I don't remember and then all of a sudden it triggers and you're like, oh my gosh, I do remember that. So when you're writing none of that can happen in the same way you need to be present. You need to be fully there. Have had people take notes it's okay to do it's just you're not as available in the session. So the recording is far superior in that way because then you could just look Intuit back later. And you could make your notes afterwards if you wanted to. But I do encourage people, I mean, I do. I don't like the word allow, but I do allow people, if they say, can I make some notes, Alec Sure, go ahead. But the recordings way better if it's an option. So really, there's not much else to do, from your side to prepare, it's best if you, you know, I don't even like to tell people to come in in a good mood. Because if you're grieving, if you're there for mediumship, and you've lost someone that's particularly close to you, or in a particularly difficult way, you know, you might not be so Sonny and Cher you might be in a tough space, you might be in a space of grieving, you might be heavy hearted, that's okay. That doesn't affect the reading in a negative way. It's just you being emotionally open, and that counts as emotionally open, you're allowed to be having challenging feelings, as well as happy feelings, whatever it is for you that day. It's more about not coming in frantic and stressed and late. It's really what it is. Now, this brings me to that little trigger warning that I gave at the beginning. So oftentimes, people will ask me, Well, I was, sometimes they'll state it as a statement. You know, I was worried that my loved one wouldn't come through because they passed in XYZ fashion. That, in the best of my understanding is not a problem. So what I want to say is, I know that there have been a lot of questions over the years and a lot of different theories and dogma, in some cases about what happens to our soul. When we pass in a challenging way. When we pass by completion of suicide, when we pass by overdose, when we pass by some other intentional or, I don't know, a way that has a negative connotation, I guess, the soul is not harmed by the difficult emotions in our life, meaning it doesn't affect the soul, and that they still get to go to the same place, they don't have to get stuck in some version of purgatory or like a spirit world waiting room, they cross right over there immediately, with loved ones and surrounded by love. And it's been communicated to me several times in several ways by several people on the other side, that, in fact, they're given extra love, extra compassion, extra healing, because they need to understand to integrate the challenges that they had that led them to that type of passing. So it's not that they're shunned or put in a bad place, or put in a waiting place. They are given additional love and care and support, because that is what they need to make that transition from the difficult human state that they were just in that led them to that type of passing into the pure love soul state, it's immediately what they're entering into. It's just that they're given extra love, support, compassion, healing, so that they can come to different understanding. And I think it's so important to keep saying and to keep spreading this message because, you know, different cultures and different societies are different. But by and large, there's such a stigma around people who pass through overdose, or through completion of suicide. And I'm here to tell you, this might not be a popular opinion with everybody. So I'm sure I'm gonna get read in the comments about this, but it's just not true. There's no judgment on our soul for having challenging emotions in life, or challenging circumstances that lead to passing through overdose or completion of suicide. There's no judgment about that. On the other side, there's love there is compassion, there's understanding there is healing, they go to the same place. And, you know, I can't tell you how many parents that I've worked with that have lost children through one of these types of passing or other tragic past things that were perhaps not of a I don't there's not a good way to say this. But you know, you could say not of natural causes, but you know, our emotions and natural cause, perhaps that's, I guess we could argue that out, right? Let's argue it out in the comments. Is that a natural cause? Or is it an unnatural cause? And does it even matter? Right? But, you know, I think so many parents especially but other people, too, that lose people through these types of passing, come in with just this fear of like, Is my person okay? Did they make it Who are they with? Are they do they still get all the same privileges on the other side, for example, is there so scarred in some way, are they being punished in some way? No, they still get to be with you, they still get to, you know, just like that boy I was talking about earlier who knew his family moved, they still get to spend time with you. In fact, the way that they often express it to me is that all those challenging emotions, those human emotions that plagued them, and that were so difficult for them in this life are stripped away when they cross over, because that's part of our human self, not part of our soul self. And when they cross over, they're much freer, they often will express that they are the best and happiest and lightest version of themselves. So I just think it's important to let people know that and again, I want to go back to what I said at the beginning, about the communication and how it works. Sometimes people don't want to tell me how they passed, I've had people that have passed and some of these traumatic, tragic, difficult ways who don't want to talk about it, they want to talk about the life they lead, they want to talk about memories they had, and they want to talk about how they're with their family. Now. The times when they will talk about their passing is if it's needed, remember, we're addressing a need. So it's not necessarily only if the person my client, my sitter needs to hear or understand about how they pass if they need to express something, or clear up something, or apologize for something or express understanding about something, that's when they will share it. And perhaps, you know, in some cases, you know, sometimes it is part of the need that they need to clarify, I do understand what happened, I do understand that there was a different way I do understand how much you love me and how much sadness I've left behind. And I didn't understand that before. That's a need, that might be their need. And in that case, they might express details about the challenges in their life, their passing, things like that. But it's always in the spirit and in in the emotion of upliftment of moving things in a positive direction of healing of releasing difficult emotions and processing them. It's never in a way, they're never giving it in a way to like hurt the person's feelings, or to open up a wound or trauma again, they're always giving it in a way around healing and around understanding and around compassion and love. Now, as I say that, you guys know, sometimes I'm getting additional information and intuition as I do these chats with you these one on one chats. And I love that we can have these intimate one on one chats, as well. But sometimes, clients sitters recipients are scared about what the spirit person might talk about. Now, often, you know, I've had someone come in who has someone on the other side, let's just give an example. And say it's an uncle, and this uncles on the other side, and this uncle was abusive to them in life. And sometimes my clients say, you know, I'm scared that you're going to know things about me, or sometimes they don't even say it. Sometimes there's an internal fear as we're thinking about having a reading of, I don't want salt in my wounds, I don't want to hear about all that trauma. Again, I don't want to go there again. And I want to talk about a couple of things with that. So again, I want to go back to that any information that is shared from the spirit world is always in the spirit of love, of understanding of healing, and never intended to open old wounds, or to be said in a hurtful way to it's part of my training, and are also part of my soul, that I know how to say these things in a delicate way. And also just reminded me so much of a recent client. If I'm aware of trauma, abuse,
really difficult situation in a relationship with a person who's crossed over, I as the medium, blended with their soul might understand all the difficult details. I might even see in my mind's eye flashes of visions of understanding of the specific trauma that you experienced, or the specific trauma that they experienced. But there's absolutely no need for me as a medium to go in and recount every single painful detail for my sitter that's not healing. I could simply say it in a way. You know, for example, in a session recently, I had a client, they had a parent on the other side who was very abusive in very many ways. And I didn't go into details about explaining all the situations, but I did it was It was apparent, like I said, on the other side, but I did express some details that were given to me that were shared with me through this communication about that parents personality, about how difficult they were about how angry they could get. And then when it came to the actual specifics of the types of trauma, I could simply stated as and I understand that there's physical trauma here. That's it, I don't have to go into great detail that's not needed. My client knows what happened. They know I understand enough of what happened to understand what's going on in this communication with this parent on the other side. So that's also something to know that if you have a good medium, or a good psychic, when they give you details, they're going to be gentle with you with your soul, there's a compassion, there's a kindness, all mediums are healers at the bottom of it, because all of this work is going towards healing, healing for the spirit world healing for the people on this side. So all of this communication is meant to be healing, uplifting, clarifying. And sometimes it's just that one grain of detail of hope that there was enough information given that you know, that that could have only come from one person, that there's no way your medium could have known those details, at least some of them. And that it just opens your mind or your heart just an inch more. To believe maybe there is something more than this. Sometimes that's the healing. We're all in different places, like I said, you could come in to me tomorrow, and you could come in six months from now. And you might be in totally different places in your life and your emotions and your mind. So really, all of the spirit world communication is intended for healing at the very base of it. And it's different with the psychic work because, you know, again, this is an anti bank teaching, but sometimes our human nature, especially among the spiritual gifts, and the spiritual community can be to kind of like rank these gifts, meaning like oh, is mediumship better than psychic is psychic better than mediumship? No, neither one is better, they're different. But they're equal. And they serve the same purpose. So for me, if I lose someone that I love, it's very close to me. That could be painful, traumatic, very emotional, all of those things. But if I lose a relationship here in the physical world, if I separate or divorce, if I am estranged from a best friend or child, if I, you know, am facing a really difficult decision about my job, or about giving tough love to someone that's experiencing an addiction, hear in my physical life, hearing about those things, and getting guidance, details, understanding about those things is just as valuable. It just depends where we are in that moment, right. And one moment, it might be the most valuable to hear from a loved one who's crossed over and another moment, it might be the most valuable to hear about a situation that you're experiencing in your life right now. So those are equal in value, they just are different. But like I said, they both serve the same purpose of healing, growth, understanding. So in that way, it makes them equal. And you don't really need to do anything differently to prepare for your session, whether it's, you know, intuitive guidance, or psychic guidance that you're hoping for versus mediumship communication. And like I said earlier, depending on your medium are your psychic reader. It might be just whatever you need in that session, which is the way I work. Sometimes my sessions are completely mediumistic. And I'm only communicating with loved ones in the spirit world and giving those details and having my clients say yes, they understand or no they don't and working with the spirit person. Sometimes my sessions are completely psychic or intuitive. Where I'm only in the space of my sitter, my client only working with their soul and understanding their life choices, things happening guidance, that kind of thing. And more often than not, it is a combination of those two things. So perhaps, you know, a percentage of the session is a little bit about their life and something going on with them. And a percentage of the session is about the spirit world and who's communicating and a loved one that wants to say hello to them. Now, as I tell you that there's another thing that I want to share. And this is a little bit more when you're already in the session.
Just let your medium work. And what I mean by that is You know, sometimes it's not always like, especially in in mediumship, when we're communicating with people on the other side, it's not always the person that you are there to hear from, that's the first one through. So for example, recently, I had a client who really wanted to hear from their best friend that had crossed away, that was the person they really wanted to hear from their passing was kind of recent, and they just really needed to know that this person was okay and was still with them, and just really wanted to hear from this person. Now, the first person I was aware of was their grandpa, that was not their friend. And then after grandpa came, an aunt that was on the other side, and after aunt came a different friend that was on the other side. And then finally, for the grand finale, to close it all out was the friend that they had hoped to hear from, why does that happen? I can give you some several speculations as to why that that happens. Truthfully, we don't know everything, right. And that's where I am back to the spirit world, sometimes understanding the energy differently, and perhaps better than we do, from our vantage point, maybe one speculative theory, maybe that's what needed to happen to build the energy in the room. So that I was energetically at the place I needed to be to chat with this friend who was the star of the show that day, maybe it was to set my client at ease, to help her relax and help her know, okay, I do recognize this person, this is surprising, maybe it was to get her out of her head a little bit. There's lots of reasons that that can happen. Maybe it's that these other people had something to say. And that was the case in this to at least one of the the answers in this occasion was that these people hadn't gotten a chance in a long time to say hello to her. And one of the other things that came out in the details of the session was that my client, this sitter felt very alone in the world at this time in her life, and and at this stage, and with what else was going on in her personal life, she was feeling very alone, she was feeling very outcast, she was feeling very, like I'm all alone in this, and I don't have any support, and I just lost my best friend, and what the hell am I doing? And so that's why several other people, you know, one of the other reasons, perhaps that several other people came to communicate with her that day was to also let her know, hey, you're not alone, you have a lot more support than you realize. For you. Here, you have a friend over here that you forgot about that was over here that you lost many years ago. That wasn't someone you even expected to communicate when you were thinking about this session. So there's a lot of reasons why different people come through in a different order. The way we often say it is the Spirit World orders themselves, meaning they line up in the order that they need to, for the communication in that session to make it the best it can be. They're not orchestrating all of this so that the session can be a flop. I mean, they want it to be the best it can be, I want it to be the best that it can be I as a medium, I'm doing several things. As kind of like a workout, quote, unquote, or training all of the time, there are certain things I'm doing in my energy, certain things I'm responsible for doing to make myself be in the best place that I could be for that session. So I'm doing my little bit of work. Another thing to know is, it's my belief and the belief of a lot of colleagues and friends that are also mediums. It's really the spirit world, you know, most of the time, especially if it's like a medium ship communication, they're the ones orchestrating these sessions, not me, not you. Where I see this is like so many times, I'll have clients come in and say, I don't even really know how I found you. I just like your page popped up, or I clicked some other link. And then someone mentioned you and then I saw this or this podcast, I listened to you, you were on there, and and then I just felt so drawn to you or I saw your picture, or I heard you talk and I just I just knew you were the person I needed to see. And this is true for group mediumship readings as well like we call them demonstrations, public demonstrations of mediumship. That's when there's a medium who works from a platform or a stage or upfront in the room. And a group of people that we're reading for sometimes this group knows each other. And sometimes it's a public event, like where you buy tickets like the one that I've got coming up in March that I'll mention in just a minute. So if someone is in the room at one of these group mediumship readings, it's usually their loved ones in the spirit world that get them there. It's not me. It's me creating the opportunity and it's the spirit world that's orchestrating everything. So, on the other side, they know who's going to be in that room before I do. They know who's going to communicate from the spirit world, the people that the 10 people that night that are going to communicate with loved ones in the audience. They You know, before I do, they are the ones that create the situation, they are the ones that help get you in those seats, that nudge you that encourage you that put that link or ad or website across your path that will help you here, you know, I have a funny story. I try to keep these like so anonymous when I share about people just because I truly respect everyone's privacy as you would imagine. So I've had it where two people came to an event and didn't know that the other one was coming. And one of them said, you know, she had a friend that had a reading and something she'd been curious about. And she didn't ask this person about the reading. But they came and told her and came and told her all about it. And it just made her so much more curious. And it made her feel like, okay, this is for me, I don't know why, but I know I'm supposed to go to this event, okay, I want to sit in the back, I don't want any attention. And then the other person sat right up front. And this person came to the reading in a strange way to like, invited by some friends, and then other people dropped out. And so they ended up being one of the only ones there. Now, the person that I was communicating with from the spirit world was a young man. And he was giving detail. And both of these people in the audience, were raising their hand that they understood the detail. And as it works out, they recognized when they were, you know, raising their hand and standing up to give detail that they know each other. And then suddenly, I was aware, do you guys know each other, you both know this person. And it was it was a person, a young man who was communicating and he was there for both of them. And they didn't even know that each other was going to attend this event that can happen sometimes. So there are an endless number of things that can happen with the spirit world orchestrating things, but just know that really, your only job is to have an open heart and an open mind. If you're resistant to the communication, like I said, it's not it's one of the reasons I love evidential. Mediumship is it's typically not. So general meaning like, sometimes you'll hear mediums that are like, you know, oh, I, I have a woman here, she's your grandma, and she's showing me blue shoes. What does that mean to you? Well, that is not the way I'm trained to work and an evidential mediumship, that's not necessarily acceptable, I'll say it that way. So when evidential mediumship it would be more like, I have your grandma, and she is reminding me of a memory of when she bought you the shiny blue shoes that you really wanted. That's two different things. And the more general version is what where you'll hear things like, you know, they're, they're proud of you, they love you. They're encouraging you. And they will often say whatever that means to you. So, while those messages are beautiful, and wonderful and valid, of course, they love you and miss you and are proud of you. It's a little different when you have specific, quote unquote, validation or evidence of the person's life of their personality of their memories of things about them, or, you know, it can be any number of things that they could share, like I said, but it just is a little different. It just feels a little more valid. And there's less questions maybe afterwards, meaning, you know, I've had readings where, to be quite honest, they've not proven that that's my grandma. Like, yeah, there's a grandma, I don't understand any of the things you're saying about her.
But yes, my grandma's on the other side. So you've just proven that there's a grandma on the other side, who's proud of me, Okay, that's great. But it's a little bit different. When someone is saying, I have your grandma here, and they're describing her house to me, or they're describing the nature of the family. To me, my family is kind of unique. So they're telling me some details about the family, or they're telling me, oh, I have your grandma here. And it's the one who was raised in Italy. And she XYZ and that's different. That's like, oh my gosh, maybe that is my grandma. Hold on. I'm listening. So it's why I like that style of mediumship. But the only thing you have to do to receive it is just have an open mind. So those are the best tips I have in this moment for how to get the most from your mediumship or psychic reading. Now some readers mediums psychics will take questions. So it's okay to prepare a loose list of things you'd like to hear about. But just know that for most for me, I'll speak for myself. I'm not going to go down that list of questions. The way I typically like to work is let's just see what happens meaning I the way I say it is I'll open my awareness and I'll see where we're gonna go. Sometimes I might be drawn psychically, to their space to talk about things going on in their life. Sometimes I might be aware of a spirit person, a loved one on the other side who's ready to communicate and I'm, and that's where I go. And then I start working and details come and they say yes or no to me as I give those details. I don't like to start with a list of questions, I hope that several of those questions get answered in our work together or get touched on or taken care of. But sometimes they don't. Sometimes I will ask the person if they have an additional question, but not always, sometimes it's not necessary. And like I said, I'm back to sometimes what we think we want to hear about. And what we need to hear about are not the same thing. So I just if you have a list of things you want to touch on, keep it loose and easy. Rather than having a demand list of things that you know, your loved one must say, or that must come out in a session. And the other thing is, depending on what you're there for, like I said, you're not going to have time to hear from every single person that you've ever lost, or every single issue necessarily that's going on in your life, the hope is just to touch the greatest need in that moment. Sometimes additional things come along with it. And sometimes not, it just depends on the session and what we actually need in that moment in our lives, for our soul, or for the souls of our loved ones on the other side. So I hope you are feeling better prepared for your own psychic or mediumship reading. The other little thing I like to tell people is with me anyway, you don't need to bring anything. I know some mediums encourage people to bring like an object or an item. And it's a cool thing. It's called psychometry. It's sometimes a different way of feeling connected to that spirit person, I sometimes have people bring objects, I like to see them just because I'm nosy by nature, as you guys know. But for me, I don't need to hold an object. And actually sometimes it's a little distracting. For me, I was a little embarrassed to say this because I know a lot of mediums work this way. Sometimes if I'm holding that object My mind is so like, oh my gosh, what is this, this is a shirt, this is a big shirt or a small shirt. This is like I don't like it because my mind wants to come in and try to like discern information, when really I need to be not in the left analytical side of my brain, I need to be completely in my right mediumship side of my brain and just open to understand the information. So don't let that throw you I do have people bring items. But it's just not it's not necessary. Often, if someone brings a photo, I will have them hand it to me face down, I don't want to see the photo. And sometimes people will bring something in an envelope. And that's great too, because then I don't want to worry about what that item is. Sometimes I'll know what it isn't. Sometimes they won't sometimes it will just be details about you know, the family or other stories that come up. I once had someone in a group, a group reading was a private group reading. So they were doing it for a private event, I think there was about 10 of them. It was myself and another medium. And they gave us photos and objects and items in envelopes. And that was kind of cool. And the one the one that I had, I won't tell you her as she it should be on at some point she could tell you but the one that I had, what was so cool is that I was aware of this person's mom in the spirit world and the details I was giving about her her personality, some of the like fun, quirky things that she liked. In this reading this session. This, this mom was much, much older, and she still really loved to rock like bright red nails. And that was one of the things I was describing about her as describing, you know, her personality and the way she liked to put herself together and several other memories and things. And then at the end when I opened the photo, it was this lovely senior lady who had these crazy bright red nails even in this photo and the photo was from like a banquet or you know, something where she was like a little bit done up. So it was just kind of cool to see. It's still always cool and surprising for me even as a medium because just like every conversation you have in life is a little bit different. And every person that you meet in life is a little different. Every spirit person is a little different. And the details they share are a little different because their lives are unique and individual. So I hope that answers some of your questions about readings and about how to make the most of your reading. If you have other questions, definitely send them to me you can be in the joy soul spa Facebook group where I am all the time. It's totally free. It's my community there and you can pop them in there. You can email them to me through my website joyful And I'm compiling these frequently asked questions and we could do another frequently asked question. Session topic podcast at some point. Now speaking of group mediumship readings, that's a little different. It's not a one on one session with you privately. It's in a big group like we were talking about so and group demonstrations are mediumship so not psychic mediumship I guess you could incorporate psych But that's a totally different thing. Mine are almost always strictly mediumship, especially if it's public where people are buying tickets. And so we've got an event coming up on March 19. In honor of the spring equinox, which is a very special shift in energy. It is going to be March 19. And we've made it in the day it is 12pm, Pacific 3pm Eastern, which I believe is 8pm. UK, it's called Spring forward with spirit, it's going to be me and friend of the show, medium, Carolyn Wilkins, who you might remember from the premiere episodes, we are going to be live on Zoom, I'm in California, she's in just outside Boston, where I'm from, as you guys know, and so dual coasts, we're going to be on Zoom, we've already really chatted about it, and are so excited to share this session with you, I'm going to be working and giving contacts, calm communications from loved ones in the spirit world to people who are in the Zoom audience. And Carolyn will then work as well. So you'll get two mediums, giving communication, several people in attendance will receive personal readings, meaning your own loved ones will come through, we will find you we will talk to you in front of the group. And even if you're not one of the people who gets a reading, we don't select these people ahead by the way, it's it works just like a regular session where you know, we move our awareness to the spirit world become aware of a person in the spirit world, give some details, and then figure out who they go to in the audience is is a basic explanation of the way it's works. So even if you don't get a reading, it's pretty amazing to see details and communication and what can come through. And there's also something very special that happens. Sometimes the way we say it is one message can be for many. So sometimes in a group reading like this, even though you know that's not your person, there are similarities or things that they say or phrases that come out. And you just know Oh, my loved ones here too. But that person just needed it differently than me today. But I know I'm also getting a hello for my loved one in this. And then in honor of the Spring Equinox Carolyn and I are also going to do she's going to do some trance piano. And we're going to do a message for everyone as well again, inspired message. So you'll get something even if you you know whether you get a reading from one of your loved ones in the spirit world of communication from them or not, there's something for everyone. So I hope you will join me for that. It's actually my first public demonstration of the year Can you believe it this year is already flying by. So there will be a link in the show notes. It is called Spring forward with spirit. You can also find the link in my bio on Instagram my Instagram page at joyful medium, you can find it in my joy soul spa Facebook group, you can find it on my at joyful medium Facebook page, lots of places to find out more information and get tickets. But again, that is Sunday, March 19. And we try to keep tickets really low. It's via zoom. So everyone is welcome and everyone's able to attend. So let me know if you feel a little more. Ready to get the most from reading. Even if you're not ready for a reading if you feel a little more prepared. If you feel like you understand a little bit more if you feel like this was helpful. I hope so so many of you have asked for this topic. So I'm really, you know, grateful for you telling me what you want to hear about and more than happy to oblige. So Big hugs, lots of love. I can't wait to see you again next week. Oh my gosh. I'm gonna give a little spoiler alert. We're gonna have an amazing astrologer astrologer who's going to give us kind of a reading or a report themes for the Spring Equinox how the energy is changing. And it's apparently the astrological new year. We just recorded yesterday and I'm so excited for that episode. So make sure you tune in for that episode as well. And like I said, I would love to see you at the spring forward with spirit group reading event coming up March 19. Hope to see you all very soon. Big hugs. Bye for now from inside the spirit speakeasy

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